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Tuesday, October 24, 2006

I almost didn't notice it had been you all the time. The lights of the city didn't let me recognize you straight ahead. I never thought you'd be back somehow, in somebody else's body. I never brought to my mind the idea of you and I under the shiny orange lights. I thought I had lost you for good. But you've always chosen the right bodies, the right hands, the right lips, but not yet the perfect way for not seeing you again, for not leaving me with this bigger void that I know you don't think you'd cause every time you come and go. You've always left this taste of "I want some more", you never tell me when you'll be back again, in which body, in which corner of my mind I'll find you again.
You kissed me with the perfect kiss, in the perfect place, away from everybody, with the perfect light and the perfect noise. Your hands on my hips told me that it was definitely you. And I couldn't say no when you asked me to stay with you that night, I couldn't desire going back home because all my desire were you, Thomas. Yes, finally it was you knocking at my door again, asking me to let you in, to be one with you, to please each other.
Were your hands on my back, your fingers on my waist under the clothes, your nails on my legs, your lips on my glass, and I couldn't think of anything else but making you mine, for a second that won't make a difference and won't last but a second.
I want to repeat every single second of you, Thomas, being mine, in all your different bodies. I'm still hungry of you, it will never be enough, I will always live with the memories and the anxiety of the times I've found you, the bodies I've fucked thinking it was you all the time, all the emptiness you leave, when suddenly, in the middle of the night, you abandon that body and there's nothing else left for me but missing you and being totally lost in that corner where you've left me wondering when you'll be back again, if you get back.

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